Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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