low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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