Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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