He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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