problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Even the bartender felt bad for me
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Randomize
