R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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