In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
