I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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