Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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