Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
You ruined the universe
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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