get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I have fence marks all over my body
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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