I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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