you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
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My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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