are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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