she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Randomize
