Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
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