So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
