so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
