My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
