the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
These 21 Declassified Government Horrors Are Unimaginable
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!