Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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