oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Fuck me I smell like cheese
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize