Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse