How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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