Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize