12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
