We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
