so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
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She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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