I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I need to align my fucking chakras
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
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