ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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