ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
