i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Randomize
