Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
