you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
