on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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