then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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