well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
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