Whoa Z and x make the same sound
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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