I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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