Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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