I bet he comes in French.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
