oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
