it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
