Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
