I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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