dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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