I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
