He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
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