As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
