I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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