suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
is wine microwaveable?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
